Sunday, March 06, 2005

Crushed


Having a crush.
Being crushed.
You get one.
Then you get it.
I can’t pursue something that inevitably won’t work.
I can’t get deeper in it.
I can’t deal with the hurt.
I’m not afraid of commitment.
I’m afraid of the separation.
It’s the break up I can’t handle.
If I commit, I stay that way.
I hold on too tightly.
So I can’t be involved.
I get involved though.
I feel too much.
I fear too much.
I think about it.
I write about it.
I don’t talk about it really.
I wouldn’t know what to say.
I’m scared and I hate it.
I know it won’t work.
I can’t let go.
Even though I should.
I don’t want to.
I want it to work.
Relationships aren’t found.
They are made.
I don’t know that recipe.
I have to go.
My laundry is done.

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